Man I hate soccer. The worlds most overrated game to watch. Over payed players. Boring 0 – 0 results. On TV constantly. Diving and feigning injury. Impossible to avoid. Impossible to enjoy.
I gave my girlfriend Lorri a tablet for Christmas.
I said “I got you an Asus Transformer. It’s a tablet running Android with
• 25cm HD screen
• a dockable keyboard
• 2 USB slots
• mini HD slot
• NVidia Tegra 2 Graphics Card
• front and rear camera
• WiFi
• Bluetooth
• GPS capabilities
• gravity sensor
• E-compass
• light sensor
• gyroscope
• SD Card
• miniSD card
• 2 processors
• 1GB RAM
• 16 hours battery life”.
Her response “It’s so pretty. It looks like a clutch bag”.
Women!
I don’t know why but every time I look at this I start laughing. I mean every time. Normally things get old after 4 or 5 watches but this simply isn’t happening with this video.
Michael Corcoran turns into the cookie monster while commentating on two of Munsters’ Heineken cup matches won by the boot of Ronan O’Gara.
I was waiting for a bus in Mississauga which failed to arrive. Also the next bus failed to arrive. By the time the third bus finally arrived I was an hour and a half late. So I dropped a mail to the Mississauga bus company to let them know and to voice my displeasure.
This is the response I got.
“This is in reply to an e-mail you had sent to Mississauga Transit concerning an incident in which occurred on October 15, 2011 at Eglinton and Hurontario with respect to Rt 35 eastbound.
I would like to advise you that the matter has now been dealt with accordingly however, due to privacy issues governed by Labour Law I am not at liberty to discuss or divulge any personal information in regard to the action taken. Please rest assured that the necessary action has been taken.
If you have any further questions or concerns, please feel free to contact our Customer Service Department.”
Translation “Fuck off”
Well played Canada.
Here’s the new trailer for Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 3. Pretty funny if you ask me. Sadly I will probably never progress beyond the skill level of a n00b.
Why do they put stickers on automatic doors warning you that it’s an automatic door? Surely since it’s automatic it’s no danger as it will move out of your way. What they should do is put warnings on on normal doors or windows saying”WARNING: Not an automatic door”.
I was in Toronto Airport yesterday waiting for my bag and I saw this sign over the carousel. It tells people that heavy or awkward bags are available for pick up else where. I had a look at the icons and I can figure out most of them but the last one is giving me trouble. Any suggestions?
So far it seems to be;
# Fragile
# Bicycle
# Buggy
# Skis
# 1960′s Pimp
……… The only place where……..
• If you die from alcohol poisoning, you’re considered a lightweight,
• ‘Fuck off’ means ‘Are you serious?’ … …
• The person that you insult most is probably your best friend,
• Saying ‘I will yea’ means that you definitely won’t,
• “Fuck it, its grand’ means that you couldn’t be bothered finish it properly,
• ‘He’s fond of a drink’ means he suffers from severe life-threatening alcoholism,
• Saying you’re going for a drink means you might not be seen again for 3 days,
• Crisps are called ‘Taytos’ and fizzy drinks are called ‘minerals’,
• ‘For the craic’ is the best reason for doing anything,
• The best cure for a hangover is more drink,
• Nobody can go a day without saying ‘Jaysus’,
• ‘Meeting’ has a double meaning,
• Tea is the solution to every problem,
• And water is the solution to every GAA injury,
• “I got stuck behind a tractor’ is a perfectly valid reason for being late,
• We eat Tayto sambos for lunch, and ham sandwiches on the way to Croke Park,
• You can insert the name of a gardening tool into any sentence and it still makes sense, e.g. ‘I had a rake of drink last night’ or “I’ll be out in a minute, I’m just shoveling down the dinner’,
• GAA is considered religion,
• Its perfectly acceptable to call your mother ‘mammy’ even though you are a fully grown adult,
• Saying ‘Now we’re sucking diesel’ means that you are happy with the outcome of the situation,
• Drinking ‘tae’ is everyone’s favourite past time,
• You’re scared of the wooden spoon,
• The word ‘like’ goes in every sentence,
• You can say “Any craic?’ to a garda and you won’t get arrested,
• ‘The dogs’ bollocks’ means something brilliant
It finally happened. I sat in the passenger seat of my car and did the “Where’s the wheel” hand flex. Damn left hand drives.
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